Benefits of bullying? Nope.

Today, a fellow autistic person noticed an article published on the Autism Daily Newscast’s website and shared on Twitter/Tumblr/Facebook. It is this article (no fear, the link directs you to the do not link page for the article). Please note that there is a huge warning for the entire article with regard to bullying and abuse and abuse apologism and victim blaming and every horrible thing you can think of.

I clicked on the article and knew when I started reading that the author was beyond a shadow of a doubt the same one I’d interacted with about a month ago on Twitter when the same publication (Autism Daily Newscast) published another horrible piece about forced eye contact. I didn’t even have to scroll to the bottom to know that I was correct.
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Oh and she also said this, too.

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Her article is on the benefits of bullying and I am appalled. Feel free to read it in its entirety, but I am sickened by its content. Essentially, she believes that bullying isn’t ok but if it can’t be prevented (why not? Why can’t it be prevented?), then at least we should look at the benefits of bullying. I find it awful although not surprising that nowhere in the article does she really focus on the victim of the bullying, the autistic kid themselves. No, it’s how can we use this to educate others?

No. Screw that. I have been bullied from the time I was very young. Some in obvious ways (let me throw this baseball at your face and then make it look like an accident) some in more subtle ways (let me pretend to be your friend and then watch cackling as your trust in me as a friend blows up in your face). Some in very abusive ways.

The people who benefited from bullying are the bullies. It’s the kids and adults who chose to humiliate a kid who was slow on the uptake, very trusting, and you ruined that trust. You made it difficult to trust anyone. This is a lifelong struggle.

The adults I told mostly didn’t believe me and the few who did got caught up in red tape in trying to help me. Imagine you’re a 14 year old who has reported that your PE teacher has assaulted you and made inappropriate comments and you’re not believed because he’s a 60+ year old man and you’re just a kid. It’s your word against his and you attend a private religious school and this person is a church elder.

It’s 20 years later and I still have difficulties with those in authority. I still have difficulty speaking up. I have massive issues trusting people. This is the result of bullying and abuse, and it isn’t a benefit.

Karen Kabaki-Sisto, I don’t need your ire and your condescension. I don’t need bullshit articles that tell me that I need to find the silver lining.

And Autism Daily Newscast, I hope you pull this awful article. I hope that you stop publishing someone like this. Stop trying to create “discussion”. Autistic people talk among ourselves about these issues. Maybe talk to us about this instead of publishing self centered, ego maniacal self proclaimed “experts” on autism.

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4 thoughts on “Benefits of bullying? Nope.

  1. I can’t even begin to understand the thought process behind this. I’m Autistic and have been diagnosed as such ever since I can remember. I was in a school system that didn’t really know how to work with Autistic children and I was put in a special education class, then moved to a class specifically for children with “anger and aggression” issues. I was bullied on a regular basis, and, on one particular afternoon, I was being bullied by a classmate because I was much better than her in art class (mind you, this was second grade) and she was offended when I defended myself when she called me names. She later jumped me with five -male- friends who were all older than me. I fought back, and I got expelled while the others got a detention. My mother started homeschooling me for that reason and I could not be more thankful for that, and it’s a big reason why I’ve decided to homeschool my own children. My son has shown signs of being Autistic and we’re still going through several rounds of appointments with various specialists. At 2.5 years old, he still doesn’t talk.

    I’m really happy that I found your blog. It’s nice to see someone taking a stand like you are.

    Like

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